Somethings Up?
Chris Brown
Jail Is Terrible
I Feel Like a 'Caged Animal'
3/21/2014 10:23 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
EXCLUSIVE
Chris Brown says he's finally been scared straight -- because he learned pretty quickly ... jail sucks.
You'd think the photos of Rihanna's battered face would have left an impression ... on him. But apparently it took a few days in solitary to shake Chris to the core.
One source -- who recently spoke with Brown on the phone -- tells us, Chris says he feels like "a caged animal," calling it "the worst experience of my life."
We're told Chris has been spending his time behind bars working out and writing music. He's telling people on the phone, "I'll never f*** up again."
Not particularly convincing.
Lucky for Chris ... he's rich enough to buy his way out of jail -- as we reported, he's negotiating to pay off his alleged assault victim in D.C. so the case goes away and the judge in the Rihanna case lets him loose ... to roam freely again.
Warren Buffett
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
3/21/2014 11:25 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Breaking Brackets
... and with Duke losing to Mercer, it seems Warren Buffett -- and his 1 BILLION DOLLARS -- are safe.
Unless, of course, you picked Mercer.
But you didn't.
No one did.
Sucks to be Duke.
In case you didn't know ... Buffett was offering a $1 billion prize to anyone who submitted a PERFECT bracket through Yahoo and Quicken Loans.
After the first day, 83% of the people in the contest were eliminated. It's unlikely anyone survived after the Duke upset..
BONUS: Here's Mercer player Kevin Canevari celebrating the win by busting out the Nae Nae.
'Today' Show Stunt
Al Roker Faux Filthy Rant on Billy Bush
3/21/2014 10:15 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
EXCLUSIVE
The "Today" show has an interesting new strategy for regaining its king-of-the-morning title ... do a phony, f***-laced meltdown with Al Roker ... but the show needs some pointers ... which TMZ will gladly offer.We just got this video of Al going off on Billy Bush, who was interviewing Johnny Weir during the Sochi Olympics. The clip has a whispery set-up, where Al seems to be schooling Billy who just doesn't know his place on the broadcasting food chain.
And then Al rants ... and it's dirty. And NBC clearly wanted us and everyone else to run it ... which we will gladly do.
Advice to NBC: Lose the crew from the shot. The camera guy can barely focus he's laughing so hard. Also, use a lavalier mic (clip-on), rather than a boom. The boom is in Al's face so there's no way anyone would believe it's authentic. And, get Al an acting lesson or 2. The overacting is felonious.
Nonetheless .... it's an interesting new strategy. We'll see if foul-mouth stunts actually work.
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